Wedding Rings

Not sure where do I start to plan my wedding (HELP)

Question:

About organizers and planners – you really don’t need to buy one of the official planners (although checking out the timelines and checklists is helpful).  What I found incredibly useful was one of those expandable sectional envelope/binder things – I labeled each section ("Guest Lists," "Ceremony," etc.) and as I accumulate lists and information, everything goes in the appropriate section and I’m less likely to lose stuff!  (It also seems to impress vendors – they all think I’m incredibly organized when they see me whip this thing out!)  You can find these things at Target, office supply places, etc, and they are definitely cheaper than most "wedding planners"! Good luck! Irene

Response:

GO to a bookstore and buy a weddign planner.  It will help you plan out a timeline up to your wedding.  I would start by booking the church and reception site.  Then, you can start looking for your dress and booking other vendors.  Once all the vendors are booked and the dresses are taken care of, then you can worry about the details.  A wedding planner will really helpe you.  They cost about $20, and there are many to choose from. I like "Planning a Wedding to Remember" by Beverly Clark, but you can look through them and decide which one is best for you.  They will have budget planners, places to take notes, and ideas.  I woudl also recommend starting up a sprial notebook where you take notes on everything.  Make sections so you don’t forget anything.  Write down names of vendors, phone numbers, descriptions, etc…  This will help in decision-making and keeping everything straight.  To do lists for each week or each month really help. Good Luck. Kelli – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Hello, > I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding > and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I > start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me > any suggestions. > Thanks > CR > — > Posted via Talkway – http://www.talkway.com > Exchange ideas on practically anything ™.

Response:

> I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding > and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I > start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me > any suggestions.

The very, very first thing you should do (IMO, of course!) is prioritize what you feel is important for your wedding. You & your fiance should sit down & talk candidly about what your dreams & fantasies of your wedding are, and then start listing what’s most important and what’s least important.  Do you want a very formal wedding? Is a sentimental location important?  Are fancy clothes important?  Do you want to have tons of people there?  Is great dance music really important?  Do you want to emphasize your family history/ethnicity/religion?  Are a good meal & fine wines important?  Do you want a very casual wedding?  Is having fun the most important thing? Think about it together for a while.  Don’t buy anything at this point — you’ve got plenty of time for dress shopping!  In fact, you don’t want to buy a dress until you & your finace (& possibly your families) decide on what time of day & what setting the wedding will be in (a casual picnic wedding in a garden or park would call for a very different dress than an evening dinner & dancing wedding at a swanky hotel).  Once you have some ideas about what’s most important for your wedding, you can start budgeting & then looking for sites, dresses, etc. Setting clear priorities at the outset will keep your planning on track, & it makes it easier to budget. For example, if a specific style of location is the most important thing for you, then spend your money there & eliminate everything that’s not as critical to your wedding-view.  If you hate big foofy dresses or limos or wedding bands, skip ‘em all & put your money into what really floats your own boat.  Remember, you *don’t* have to have all the nonesense the magazines & books (& websites & newsgroups) say are "essential" for a happy wedding.  Just stick with what you personally love, & ditch all the rest. –T. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . a.g.f.faq.chick                   gothic martha stewart sales at http://members.ebay.com/aboutme/toreadorbat/

Response:

First of all-Congratulations! I suggest you start with the church (if you are religious).  That is where we started.  Finding out what time of day your church has weddings is important because you can base everything else on that time.  For example, our church only has weddings on Saturdays from 10-3 (every hour).  With that in mind we were able to figure out what kind of a wedding we wanted (we decided on informal daytime wedding). I just ordered my gown two weeks ago, don’t let the dress store owners scare you, you do have *a little* time to play with.  My dress is *expected* in sometime in March to allow for a few months to alter. Be careful with the date you have chosen.  That date was our first choice also, we had to reschedule because it is also Prom night for many of our local high schools and reception sites were hard to come by.  It is also a big holiday weekend, so some vendors may be hard to snag (florist-photographer-dj for example). Good luck! Kerry (and David) May 13, 2000 – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding > and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I > start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me > any suggestions. > Thanks > CR > — > Posted via Talkway – http://www.talkway.com > Exchange ideas on practically anything ™.

Response:

>Hello, >I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding >and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I >start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me >any suggestions.

First of all, congratulations on your engagement! Our wedding is scheduled for December 18. The first thing my fiance and I did after we got engaged last December was sit down together and come up with a budget for the wedding. We’re paying for most of it ourselves and my parents are helping out with some of it. So,we figured out just how much we were willing to spend on each item. Armed with that, the next thing we did was look for a place to have the wedding. We knew we didn’t want a church wedding, so we scouted out hotel ballrooms, historical mansions, etc. It took us a good two and a half months of searching, calling, getting price quotes and learning about site restrictions before we found a place we loved. We booked the site 10 months in advance and yes, we did have to change the date. (we wanted to get married the weekend before, on Dec.11th, but they were already booked for that day.) Once that was taken care of, the rest was pretty easy and we’ve just been doing things one at a time – finding an officant and a photographer, finding bridesmaid’s dresses and groomsmen and groom’s tuxedos, finding a wedding cake, etc. I think the most important things are to make sure you set a budget and stick to it, find a site early and, most importantly, have fun and work together on this! Amy

Response:

Actually, I should probably explain more about my dress.  I found it at a local shop and then found it for $200 cheaper online at www.netbride.com.  I decided I was going to order it from netbride since I was very unhappy with the local shop (who by the way wouldn’t tell me the designers name).  Anyhow, when I decided I was going to buy it over the internet I became concerned with y2k issues so I figured I would get it now.  I am very happy I did!  Netbride no longer carries Mon Cheri gowns.  My dress is being stored between two 100% white cotton sheets on my friends bed in a room with no light and no traffic. Anyhow, I am glad I got my dress early.  BUT, I didn’t mean to imply that you should.  Just thought it was funny how different people are when planning a wedding.  To each his own, but like I said before…The sooner you get things out of the way, the less you have to worry about as the months close in. BTW-our local paper recently published an article about how reception sites are being booked for 2000.  A lot of really nice sites have booked all their Saturday dates and most places have Fridays and Sundays partially booked.  I think this depends a LOT on where you live. So I wouldn’t worry until you find out what its like by you… Best wishes, Jen (and Mark) September 16, 2000 Wisconsin – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->LOL…My wedding is September 16, 2000.  I’ve had my dress since August >1999.  I would start looking now.  Why not get as much done in advance as >possible? > Ok, my date is only one week after Jen (see above) and I haven’t even booked > the venue yet.  Every venue that we have visited (8 different ones) have my > date available.  I don’t plan on even starting to look at dresses until after > the 1st of the year.  I am the most anal-retentive person you might ever meet, > but purchasing a dress over a year in advance strikes me as odd, especially > since you have two more seasons of possible dress lines to see.  But to each > his own.  I am sure having the dress purchased is a huge relief! > Rule of thumb I hear on dresses is you have to give them 6 months.  That means > you need to start looking now if you are going to wear a traditional gown.  The > venues must be booked first so you can make sure you find a place with your > desired date. > And no, I am not worried about the pace I am going at.  When you live in a big > city, there are plenty of good vendors.  Once the venue is booked (probably > next weekend), I think the photographer is next. > Melissa (to Paul) > 9-24-2000

Response:

>LOL…My wedding is September 16, 2000.  I’ve had my dress since August >1999.  I would start looking now.  Why not get as much done in advance as >possible?

Ok, my date is only one week after Jen (see above) and I haven’t even booked the venue yet.  Every venue that we have visited (8 different ones) have my date available.  I don’t plan on even starting to look at dresses until after the 1st of the year.  I am the most anal-retentive person you might ever meet, but purchasing a dress over a year in advance strikes me as odd, especially since you have two more seasons of possible dress lines to see.  But to each his own.  I am sure having the dress purchased is a huge relief! Rule of thumb I hear on dresses is you have to give them 6 months.  That means you need to start looking now if you are going to wear a traditional gown.  The venues must be booked first so you can make sure you find a place with your desired date. And no, I am not worried about the pace I am going at.  When you live in a big city, there are plenty of good vendors.  Once the venue is booked (probably next weekend), I think the photographer is next. Melissa (to Paul) 9-24-2000

Response:

LOL…My wedding is September 16, 2000.  I’ve had my dress since August 1999.  I would start looking now.  Why not get as much done in advance as possible? Jen – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Hello, > I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding > and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I > start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me > any suggestions. > Thanks > CR > — > Posted via Talkway – http://www.talkway.com > Exchange ideas on practically anything ™.

Response:

What city do you live in?  Are there a lot of places you could hold your reception? Do you want an indoors or outdoors ceremony?  Are you religious?  Will it be a big event or small intimate ceremony?  How much do you have to work with? Are you parents helping pay? Jen (and Mark) September 16, 2000 Wisconsin – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Hello, > I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding > and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I > start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me > any suggestions. > Thanks > CR > — > Posted via Talkway – http://www.talkway.com > Exchange ideas on practically anything ™.

Response:

> I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding > and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I > start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me > any suggestions.

First, make sure that you can find a ceremony and reception site for your chosen date. It’s very common for Happy Couples to try a couple of different dates before settling on one that will work. Popular sites often book up a year or more in advance. It’s not impossible to find a nice site for this coming May, but you may find that you have to go one week earlier or later. Unless you expect to lose or gain large amounts of weight, you might as well look for a dress now, while you’re feeling enthusiastic. There’s no harm in getting your dress early, but you can make a lot of stress for yourself by trying to find one at the last minute. A good place to start is by getting yourself a nice basic wedding planner — the free ones enclosed with some wedding magazines are enough to get you started. Ignore their timelines, as they’ll tell you that you’re already behind schedule. But look at the list of stuff that’s usually included in a wedding. You don’t have to have all that stuff — lots of couples don’t — but it helps to know what kinds of things couples often do. It’s also very helpful to use this list to brainstorm with your fiance so you know what parts of your wedding will really take work and thinking. For instance, when hubby and I got to "wedding rings," we both knew we wanted plain gold bands, so we didn’t have to discuss that any more, and we knew shopping for wedding rings would be very easy. "Flowers" was a more controversial topic, and we did some checking around at florists before deciding to do our own flowers. "Invitations" were an immensely controversial topic, leading to far too much agonizing, but at least we figured that out early and had time to find a solution. Wende

Response:

I agree.  Ceremony site and reception site are must haves. When you talk with other vendors, one of their very first questions will be "What’s the date of your wedding?"  Until you have a person to marry you and a place to get married locked in, you can’t answer that question… As for dresses, start  to look as soon as you want.  I started *way* before the time that you’re *supposed* to start looking for a dress.  It was one of my favorite parts of the wedding planning… Also, you might want to check out some books from the local library on weddings.  Most of them have very helpful lists.  In the post engagement excitement, I bought one, but in retrospect it was a waste of money.  You can get just about everything you need by photocopying a few pages…. good luck, meister – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I’m rather new at this also, but I’ll give some advice anyway.  You can > decide what it’s worth > First of all, if you want a religious ceremony, don’t decide on any date > until you call your church/house of worship/whatever applies.  Don’t > book ANYTHING until you do this.  The date you want may not be > available, and if you book the reception hall for a date that your > church (etc.) isn’t, you’re stuck. > Start talking to other newlyweds in your area.  Recommendations are the > best way to find a good reception hall.  Get going on this immediately. > Depending on your area, the halls may book up quickly.  Here in the > suburbs of NYC, the places are booked solid almost a full year in > advance. > Really, any other advice depends on what type of a wedding you want. > When we started planning, the first thing we did was sit down together > and discuss what type of a wedding we would want.  Big?  Small? > Lavish?  Intimate?  Describe your dream wedding, and have him do the > same.  Hopefully they will be somewhat alike.  If not, work together > until you’re both happy and agree on the big details.  Also, at the same > time decide how much you can afford to spend, and whether your parents > will help out.  Weddings can be as expensive or as modest as you like. > Reception halls/caterers vary greatly in price, so you can’t really go > looking at halls until you have a round figure of how much you can > afford.

Response:

Hello, I just got engaged this past weekend.  Know I need to plan my wedding and don’t know where to start.  We set the date for May 27,00. should I start looking for dresses know or should I wait.  Anyone can give me any suggestions. Thanks CR — Posted via Talkway – http://www.talkway.com Exchange ideas on practically anything ™.

Response:

> We set the date for May 27,00. should I start looking for dresses know or > should I wait.

The first thing I did was start looking for reception places.  Although seven months may seem like a long time, it’s really not.  And, at least in this area, places around that time are starting to fill up. Sit down with your FH (and families if appropriate) to talk about what everyone would like in a reception.  Is it going to be a full course meal or will cake and punch work for your tastes? This isn’t necessarily the only way to start but, depending on the size of your wedding, it might be a good place. Just my $.02 Meredith to Bill April 29, 2000

Response:

Thanks for your reply.  I am kind off new to all this so I am a bit confused.  I just called a reception hall today but haven’t heard from them yet. Are you married? sorry to be personal but maybe you can give me more advice regarding my preparation.   Thanks CR — Posted via Talkway – http://www.talkway.com Exchange ideas on practically anything ™.

Response:

I’m rather new at this also, but I’ll give some advice anyway.  You can decide what it’s worth First of all, if you want a religious ceremony, don’t decide on any date until you call your church/house of worship/whatever applies.  Don’t book ANYTHING until you do this.  The date you want may not be available, and if you book the reception hall for a date that your church (etc.) isn’t, you’re stuck. Start talking to other newlyweds in your area.  Recommendations are the best way to find a good reception hall.  Get going on this immediately. Depending on your area, the halls may book up quickly.  Here in the suburbs of NYC, the places are booked solid almost a full year in advance. Really, any other advice depends on what type of a wedding you want. When we started planning, the first thing we did was sit down together and discuss what type of a wedding we would want.  Big?  Small? Lavish?  Intimate?  Describe your dream wedding, and have him do the same.  Hopefully they will be somewhat alike.  If not, work together until you’re both happy and agree on the big details.  Also, at the same time decide how much you can afford to spend, and whether your parents will help out.  Weddings can be as expensive or as modest as you like. Reception halls/caterers vary greatly in price, so you can’t really go looking at halls until you have a round figure of how much you can afford.

Response:

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